THINGS MEN KNOW...THAT WE TRY TO KEEP SECRET

I am bored and it is raining (what is up with Chicago's weather...Africa Hot one day, Scottish Highland cool the next, today we are Bangladesh). So...I have been on Wikiquotes finding good quotes that show what really is in the minds of men...that we really don't want the ladies to know:

Women think we are normal. Like them. Cuz we talk to them like normal people. We say 'Hello', 'How are you', 'Haven't seen you in this place before', 'What kind of music do YOU like? hoha..'. But all the time in our brains we've got the word "breasts" on a loop. If we ever lost control for a second, we'd all start shouting breasts, breasts.

Look, I like naked women! I'm a bloke! I'm supposed to like them! We're born like that. We like naked women as soon as we're pulled out of one. Halfway down the birth canal, we're already enjoying the view. Look, it's the four pillars of the male heterosexual psyche. We like: naked women, stockings, lesbians, and Sean Connery best as James Bond. Because that is what being a bloke is. And if you don't like it, darling, join the film collective. Look: I want to spend the rest of my life with the woman at the end of the table here. But that does not stop me wanting to see several thousand more naked bottoms before I die. Because that's what being a bloke is. When Man invented fire, he didn't say "Hey, let's cook!" He said: "Great! Now we can see naked bottoms in the dark!" As soon as Caxton invented the printing press we were using it to make pictures of - hey! - naked bottoms. We've turned the Internet into an enormous international database of... naked bottoms. So, you see, the story of male achievement through the ages, feeble though it may have been, has been the story of our struggle to get a better look at your bottoms. Frankly, girls, I'm not so sure how insulted you really ought to be.